Bonding with Baby

Around the end of my second trimester I started to feel my belly stretching more with each week that passed. Little flutters became somersaults and I could feel her little hiccups making rhythm in my womb. I started to take long baths, rubbing my belly in excitement that I could finally feel her presence. I would turn on my radio and listen to everything from Colbie Callait to Enya and even Metallica to The Soundscapes of Nature. It was easy for me to feel my bond growing with our little girl. But then I began to worry, with Dustin working as much as he does, will he get to have this same opportunity as me, allowing him to bond with her? I turned to google and other friends asking what some ways were to help him bond with Savannah so he could feel close to his unborn and first born daughter. I think as a woman, it is obviously in our nature to want this relationship with our growing fetus. We get a connection to our baby that absolutely no one else will ever get to experience. But dads play such an important role in all of that as well. With this both being our third pregnancy experience, but our first one together, I wanted to try things differently than we both had done in our previous relationships.

I invested in a Doppler. For those who have not heard of this, its a device used by your ObGyn or Midwife that measures blood flow through the umbilical cord and other parts of their body like the brain and heart. I was hoping this would help Dustin connect to our child in utero, but even the both of us listened to it for about 30 seconds at the most and ended up putting it away. That was if we were even able to listen to her for that long as we all know, babies roll around a lot in the womb, so it was easy to lose the heart beat not long after we found it. I found using the doppler more necessary when I had started kick counting and there were days I hadn't felt movement and I would use my doppler to make sure she was safe and sound inside. If you are considering investing in a doppler of your own, I would suggest buying one used. Sometimes they can be pricey and it's not something you would use on a daily basis, maybe not even on a weekly basis, so the cost is not worth much. Not to mention, you only use it during the time of your pregnancy. I bought mine from Offer Up for only $15.

Our next attempt with bonding was kick counting and talking to my belly. Moms to be reading this, do not expect or be offended if this is not something your Significant Other is something they do not want to do. Sometimes a man (or even woman) can find it awkward just talking to a belly. I was hurt at first with this failed attempt, thanks to my pregnancy hormones, but then I realized I don't even talk to my belly. So why would I expect my Fiancé to, and he's not even the one carrying our child. Kick counting can be fun. When your partner gets involved and feels their child moving inside, or even when they can see your little baby kicking and rolling within. It starts to feel a little more real for them. The best part, you don't have to spend any money on this experience to bond with baby! I will usually start to give my belly a massage to help get her moving around inside so daddy can put his hand on her. The first time I ever felt her roll, Dustin had fallen asleep with his hand on my little baby bump and she had rolled over and fit her little body perfectly into the cup of his hand. Of course, I immediately grabbed my phone to capture this! His hand provided warmth and she was comforted by her father.

I am now 34 weeks and 4 days pregnant. With Dustin falling asleep behind me every night and holding my belly to fall asleep with both of us girls, he surprised me the other day with his own way of bonding with our daughter. I have had a hard time nesting since we didn't exactly have the space for a new baby. So instead I went through our room, the boys room and the girls room and sorted, organized and cleaned those instead. After having our baby shower and receiving so many gifts, it was finally time for me to settle in and start an area in our room for Savannah. I had initially planned to set her up in the corner of our room where her crib was already standing. Then one evening while I was enjoying my bath, Dustin brought up cleaning out our large walk in closet to create a nursery nook of her own. And I thought with that being such a idea, where would all of our stuff go? But I trusted Dusty would find a place to put everything. The very next day, I spent cleaning our closet our completely. Our bathroom and Bedroom looked as if I had been packing up so we could move. But I was too exhausted to continue. I had plans to visit my sister in Miami and I would not be able to finish until I came home from my trip. Little did I know, Dustin had taken the weekend off while I was gone to organize all of our new clothes and find closet space for them, but he also decorated and set up Savannah's new room.

When I came home to look at her room, my eyes filled with tears of joy. I was not expecting him to do this. He is usually so busy with work to provide for our home, that I did not think he would have the time to be able to help me. And not only did he help, but he took such a huge load off of me having to do it. We expect our bean to be here soon, and with time getting close, he stepped in. He said this is something he wanted to do and to make special for her because this is something he is good at doing. This was his action of love to bond with our daughter. And the way I had envisioned it, he did a much better job than I would have!

MOMS AND DADS READING THIS

please comment below for some ideas to help Dads bond with their growing babies. Sometimes giving tips and ideas will help with other dads who have a hard time finding ways to do this and we want to encourage this as much and as often as we can!